The Image of the Perfect Family

It seems that we are constantly bombarded with images of “the perfect family”. Many today are seen as being privileged, technologically savvy, self-absorbed, and social media obsessed. Many parents today are of the “millennial” generation which grew into social media. The result of a 2015 Goldman Sachs survey reports that nearly 90 percent of new parents today are millennials. Future generations will likely become even more involved in social media, being further subjected to “fake perfection” and unrealistic standards.

Current generations may be redefining and forging a new path for families to follow, they face more difficulties than what was experienced by their parents or grandparents. Not only is it more expensive than ever to have a family, but our fast-paced, hectic society offers new and different pressures for parents. This can make the idea of having a happy family seem elusive or difficult to achieve in many ways.

Top Parenting Challenges Faced Today

Families evolve with the times. Each new generation of families brings a new set of challenges, different from those that came before. Families today have their own struggles in raising a family, but the challenges they face will still influence their decisions when it comes to their children. While it is true that it is a huge responsibility to have children regardless of generation, there are some unique challenges that parents might face today:

Balancing between parenthood and career
Effective ways to disciple the children
Developing independence in children in a dangerous world
High cost of raising a family
Prevalence of single parenthood and/or the absence of help or support
Quality education for children
Guarding children against technology influences
Avoiding consumerism while living in a consumer-centric society

Parenting today is done differently from the way parents did things before. Today’s parenting is done in a highly customized kind of way that tends to embrace the changes happening around them. This new breed of parents are innovators willing to implement new ideas and discard what did not work for them or what they did not like. They are self-sustaining and independent thinkers without fear to make unconventional choices they believe are best for their families. Their creativity plays a big role in their effort to raise a happy and healthy family, while successfully living a conscientious life.

Staying Connected as a Family

In the past, the family connection very often happened around the dinner table while sharing meals each night at around the same time. Activities, such as board games, school projects, watching TV, playing outside, etc. followed next; and parents made sure children welcomed this as an important part of home life and the best opportunity to connect.

Today’s families, however, are taking a different look on how to stay connected. In the fast-paced nature of this era it can be challenging to coordinate and spend time with the whole family on a regular basis. Although there is an effort to stay connected with each other, families now acknowledge the need for flexible scheduling. Nevertheless, despite the busy schedule and other demands on having quality time together, the family remains an important support network in this generation.

Staying connected in an age where we have so many ways to connect can be challenging. Especially when you are surrounded by images of “perfect families” that can connect effortlessly, or so it may seem. This can create guilt, shame and blame if you feel you are struggling to remain connected to your family.

The Pursuit of Happiness

Amidst the many challenges, today’s families put a lot of value on happiness. They stay connected to friends, pursue their interests, and tend to stay current with social trends. There is, however, a downside to this. The perception that millennial families are composed of upbeat, confident and technologically savvy individuals does not always reflect the reality of what they may be really experiencing.

While it is true that technology allows for families to reach out to each other, it is also technology that separates and alienates members even when they think it is connecting them. Most families are disengaged with their fellow family members who turn to social media instead of spending quality time with each other. Without close family ties, individuals can feel disconnected and lonely even if they seek enjoyment elsewhere. Some members move away from home and farther from the family, contributing to the feeling of isolation, emptiness and unhappiness.

Social media can influence the way you view happiness and success, but we don’t always realize how inaccurate the images are. There is the tendency to compare with others. Social media tends to magnify this effect, which can eventually lead to depression and anxiety when your own family falls short of unrealistic expectations.

Staying Happily Connected as a Family

This generation is known to be very connected digitally. Both parents and children were likely shaped by the presence of technology and a fast-paced society. When we see visions of “the perfect family” on social media it can be easy to assume that these families do not struggle with disconnection, isolation and unhappiness. The truth is that feeling lonely and less than is universal and can happen to everyone, despite what may be portrayed online. This generation is arguably the most connected yet disconnected generation yet.

While this generation has seen the rise of social media, it has also seen a normalization in asking for help. Reaching out for support is more encouraged today, decreasing the stigma associated with therapy. Family counseling can help your family to feel more connected and to set realistic expectations.

Life can be remarkably stressful, if you are struggling with connection and bombarded with unrealistic expectations of perfection it’s unlikely you will magically feel better. Finding a therapist that is right for you and your family may be just what you are looking for.

Carolina Counseling Services – Cameron, NC is ready to help, you aren’t alone. Call CCS today and begin creating healthier connections with your family.